Good morning. So… I think it’s sun spots, because the tech issues persist. Now that Entourage loves me again (minus three days of lost messages), an hour of modem resets while talking with Earthlink tech support finally revealed that their high speed network is down in large parts of California. I’m coming to you live via dial-up from my laptop—with a VoiP phone connection that boots me every three minutes. So, today’s creature is showing itself to you without frills. It is, however, one of my favorites. It’s a strange creature, this one. Very mysterious. Possibly ancient. I hope you’ll like it and I can’t wait for your stories!

I will update this post with a fresh story banner once I can connect from my main rig again. Until then, please enjoy the excellent stories posted under yesterday’s comments. Special notice goes to new contributor Blue, who posted comments on at least ten past creatures.

As promised, a better-late-than never banner:


Please know that even without a banner and the usual nice formatting 344 LOVES YOU


  • 30 January 2007 1:31 pm

    As Mr. Bucher alluded to in the post, this is indeed an ancient beast… and one not of this world. This beast was genetically engineered by an old race of explorers to help them traverse the galaxy. Upon it’s back, we find the living pod, complete with foliage and all the amenities of modern life.
    The beast’s back changes from transparent to opaque depending on what time of day it is within it’s pod, and it produces breathable gas and water to keep those on it’s back alive.
    The beast itself feeds on solar energy, often feeding upon solar flares. Which might explain the technical difficulties Mr. Bucher experienced while capturing the beast’s likeness.

  • 30 January 2007 2:15 pm

    Before Snow Globes, there were Posterior Dorsal Caboose Globes, carried on the backs of Phalangeroos and filled with amphibious, anthropomorphic figures that resembled a species that wouldn’t hit the scene for millenia. The globes were filled with a unique aqueous substance that, when agitated by the Phalangeroos (in conjunction with a few choice Phalangerian code words), darkened and obscured the residents of said globe. When everything settled, it is said that you could peer into the globe again and your fortune would be told. A sort of Magic Eight Ball.
    You are seeing now how much influence monsters have on us in present day, and how many great ideas and inventions were actually uncovered and discovered by monsters, not humans at all.
    nice, MattLat!
    Low, mid, or high-tech, your monsters rock, Stefan. Hope you’re back cruising the cyberhighway soon and thanks for working around the woes and bringing us a monster despite the snafus. (I ordered Anime Studio last night too….who needs sleep??)

  • 30 January 2007 8:17 pm

    The Sea-Monster® (artemia monstryos) was slow to catch on in US markets. Only millimeters tall, the artemia monstryos shrouded entire miniature ecosystems beneath their crustaceous heinies. But dark waxy secretions prevented any sight of the mysterious ecosystems, so people were often unimpressed.
    Kits sold exclusively at Woolworth’s five & dime stores in the 80’s, but dwindling sales and the company’s eventual shift toward sporting goods was recipe for disaster. The Sea-Monster® kit, which originally sold for $3.44, was discontinued in 1997. Occasionally you’ll see a set pop up on Ebay, but be prepared to lay out some Benjamin’s. They’ve been known to sell for over $500.

  • 30 January 2007 10:29 pm

    They reached the summit in good time. Hito looked back at his son, Tetsuo, as he was just coming over the last ridge. He lent him a hand to pull him the rest of the way up. After a moment of relief for completing the climb, the two began to survey their accomplishment. They gazed out over the horizon, down into the valley to see the tiny village below. The Fukei River seemed but a miniscule blue serpent tracking through the valley. Forests, lush with vegetation, grew healthy in the east while the Lesser Tonju Peek stared at them from the north. And just beyond was an enormous structure that slowly bobbed and dipped.
    “The Great Mantalius guides us well today, my son. It is getting to the cold months now as we travel towards Fu’shien.” Hito sat on a smooth patch of rock and pulled out a pipe with some tobacco he grew the season before. Tetsuo looked on in awe and pride. For centuries, his village had found a home on the back of the Great Mantalius and had developed an almost symbiotic relationship with the gargantuan beast. From this height, Tetsuo could peer down the mountain and see the many legs of the creature pacing through the plains.
    It was starting to get late as the sun burned the edges of the horizon and Hito was finishing up his smoke. He stood up and packed everything away. Turning to Tetsuo, he clasped an arm on his son’s shoulder, “The wings will be closing soon, we should make our way back to the village.” They took once last, tranquil look at the outside world and as they headed down the mountain side, the Great Mantalius bent its head to look behind at the climbers. It gave a chortling sound and resumed its journey while the wings started to close overhead.
    “It saw us father. That’s good luck, right?”
    “It’s a blessing, Tetsuo. A God has spoken with us.”

  • Emmo
    30 January 2007 11:41 pm

    David stared quizzically from the hallway into the peep slot cut through the heavy metal door. The four by two inch hole barley let him get a good look at the contents of the next room. Its wall covered with old white plaster slow was crumbling to show exposed brick beneath. The floor was a simple slab of concrete with cracks running through it and the wood bench bolted to the far wall was worn smooth from its use. A fresh water dish and an untouched glob of meat sat in the corner where they were easily accessible by means of another slot. Hanging from the high ceiling was a single florescent light, the bulb blinking on and off, continually throwing the room in to darkness. The appearance of the room was not however the important part; the important part was what floated in the center.
    To say the creature floated didn’t seem to be the right description David thought, it more wafted. Hovering about two and a half feet from the ground it seemed to be off balance, tilting one way then to the other correcting it’s wobble with one of the long “legs” reaching down to the ground. Its one large eye stared blankly forward. Its flat teeth were bared in a kind of locked boredom. Beside the floating its only motion was its back inflating and deflating slightly with what was presumably its breathing. The Light from over head reflected of the creature’s tight black skin. The reflection didn’t make the creature seem slimy but gave it more of a glass like quality. David gazed at it for several seconds; the creature gave no sign of recognition that he was there, or any sign that it was even alive. Just the same dull stare.
    “I don’t understand” David stated turning to look at the group of lab-coated people standing with him in the hallway. “What was so important?”
    “Well, we have never seen anything like this.” Offered a senior scientist stepping out from the group.
    “Well, duh,” remarked David turning back to look in to the cell. “Why else would you call for a genealogist now a days? This is not so important, we have done this many times before Gus.”
    This was nothing new to David, the creature was but the job was not. He had come down to the lab many times before to look at the strange creatures that had been popping up all over. This one didn’t seem to be any more important than any other.
    “But you have barley seen it you don’t understand yet.” Gus replied timidly.
    “What do you mean? We have seen floaters before, this one doesn’t even seem to be conscious.”
    “Oh it is quite sentient, and probably a lot smarter than you!” Spat a slightly larger scientist stepping away from the group and standing beside Gus. “At the moment it simply knows that it can’t escape through that door, so it doesn’t waste brain power with communication or movement. It just waits for what it wants.”
    “Because of this patience and intelegence we believe this is quite an old, maybe ancient creature,” Gus offered up to help defend the creature in the cell.
    “Don’t get you pocket protectors all inky. So it’s smart we have seen plenty of those too,” David interjected gazing back at the eye of the creature. “What I am trying to get at here is: why I had to drag my butt out of bed because of this thing.”
    “Well, just watch,” Gus said and nodded in the direction of the cast iron door.
    David rolled his eyes and pressed his face back over the viewing slot. Same stare nothing had changed.
    “We have set up x-ray emitters in the room,” Gus explained pulling a small remote from his lab coat. He paused for what would have qualified as dramatic effect in the science world. A click. Something strange happened.
    The light in the room did not change, still the flickering of the burned bulb. The creature however changed. The large bulb on its back, which was previously solid black, became crystal clear. David stared in amazement; in side he could see land. A minuscule mountain range sat inside the now translucent bubble. A forest with trees colored in summer green foliage could be seen, as well as what appeared to be a small city tucked in the back. David just stared. Then could see them; along the side where the bubble ended he could just barley see them. Tiny little black people, perfect likeness of humanity only a millimeter tall gazing back at him.
    “We found them quite by accident,” Gus said, more for his own benefit the David’s. “When we brought it in for standard medical survey the x-ray machine caused it to do this.”
    David wasn’t listening; he was transfixed. “That’s interesting…”
    Then the creature moved. Its globe quickly returned to its original opaque color, and it stopped bobbing. It remained perfectly suspended legs tucked up against its self. Caught by surprise at the sudden change or posture David gaze jumped to the creature’s head. It looked back. It had turned its neck to stare back at David.
    “Very interesting,” the creature spoke. Then it returned its attention back to the corner and began, slowly, to waft.
    This one is by far my favorite!

  • 31 January 2007 5:43 am

    An intimate look at the DNA of Brian Mulroney.

  • Blue
    2 February 2007 2:16 pm

    one day Flea awoke to find that the tables had turned….

  • Sue Bebie
    30 April 2008 4:40 am

    Einmal nur bei Jay Leno’s Floh zur Stechparty und dann sowas…
    Vielleicht hätte ich besser nicht am Talkmaster geschlabbert…
    Jetzt geh ich mir ein Shampoo kaufen, dieses neue, besonders starke mit dem Gütesiegel “vertreibt nicht Floh, jedoch Leno”.

  • natalia escamilla
    4 February 2010 5:25 pm

    your art is awsome and my art teacher wants that poster you have. the one with all the thought bubbles. i am from the art class that emailed you our daily monsters. we were from cw davis. i was hoping mabey you could send the poster to her. she loves you so much. we are again making daily monsters and mabey we can sent you it. i want to ask you if you can maby make a monster for haiti. sincerally natalia escamilla 🙂

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