Tech note: There is something that’s not working with me and YouTube right now, so I switched to Revver for tonight. I’m sorry for the ad at the end of the clip. Revver adds it automatically. I will swap in the YouTube feed as soon as I can get the thing to work. In the meantime, I apologize for any inconvenience.

Good morning! and Herzlich Willkommen! to everybody checking in from spiegel.de and ehrensenf.de. Looks like the Monsters are getting some serious love from the Old Country. Check out the cool little video report they did on the Monsters. You can see the whole thing online or you can download the edited highlight (mp4 / 6.6MB). Either way, it’s very cool! Vielen Dank!

I hope you’ll like the new Monster. Number 20 is a much happier creature than Number 19, who got two very cool backstories from Simon and from Andrew. What’s today’s story? What’s the deal with the big belly and the hidden legs? What about the frock? And the tongue?! There is mystery in the air! I can’t wait to see what you guys think about old 20 here. Thank you for checking in again today. I hope you make it through the day in one piece and that you have a brilliant weekend ahead! Why? Because 344 LOVES YOU

P.S.: Speaking of the Old Country, the town I grew up in now has a webcam trained on its town square—and they’re having a Christmas Fair. You gotta check it out. It’s very cute!


  • 8 December 2006 2:11 am

    “this video is no longer available.”, said youtube…

  • 8 December 2006 2:33 am

    can’t view the clip, sir

  • 8 December 2006 3:46 am

    I know. I’m so sorry. I’ve been trying to upload for four hours now. It goes through all the way and then just refuses to process. My apologies. I’m still trying, but it’s looking grim right now. A different file is having the same problem. I tried using Revver, but they won’t post the clip until it’s been reviewed by a human. Sigh.

  • 8 December 2006 4:12 am

    Jogo YangLang never liked dogs very much, probably because she spent her first seven years lodged inside a Great Danes ear. She’d never enjoyed it, not even at the beginning when he was a puppy, which was why on 29 October 1973 at precisely 3.17am she sneaked out of the kennel hidden under the shell of a dead tick. She travelled and found work where she could, eventually she found herself cold and wet in Hamburg, the year was 1988.
    Since then her time spent lap dancing has left her with a dodgy knee, and a taste for the finer things in life. If you want to be her sugar daddy you can find her most nights in the VIP lounge of the Hippity-Hoppity Club.

  • Keith McCord
    8 December 2006 7:03 am

    Stefan said: P.S.: Speaking of the Old Country, the town I grew up in now has a webcam trained on its town square—and they’re having a Christmas Fair. You gotta check it out. It’s very cute!
    Your village is quite classy..all the waddle and dob architecture, so Deutsche-chic

  • 8 December 2006 7:28 am

    Seldom seen in the wild, the Roller-toe Snipe-tongue is graceful and elegant. Originating in Xalapa, the capital city of Veracruz, Mexico, the Snipe-tongue has adapted to extreme desert conditions. Vestigial legs, hidden beneath a thick layer of abdominal tissue help it to traverse through deep sand and gravel when its rollers get stuck. This particular individual, Tulipán Feo, is thought to be related to the mystical Florecita. Florecita are believed in Spanish folklore to be the most beautiful women in the world. From the looks of it, Tulipán Feo, and others like her, are very distant relatives. Once thought to have kept ties to the Xalapa region for personal reasons, the Snipe-tongue have been seen in certain parts of the US. In sister city Covina, California for example, rare sightings of Roller-toe Snipe-tongues have been reported. Most likely they migrated to the US via transport of Jalapeño peppers. It has been noted that they lack pain receptors in their long proboscis-like tongues, to capsaicin, and have developed a taste for the peppers over time.

  • fromgermany
    8 December 2006 7:43 am

    Man I just love your style!
    That’s awesome!

  • 8 December 2006 7:44 am

    I don’t mind the ad at the end. Especially if you get a cut of the ad revenue, as I believe is the case with Revver. I make a point of clicking on such ads, even. It’s the least I can do when I enjoy video’s as much as I do yours!

  • 8 December 2006 9:22 am

    Actually, the Revver video loaded faster than any of the YouTube videos ever did.
    And if you can make a few buck this way, I say stick with Revver.

  • 8 December 2006 11:11 am

    This is fantastic! I especially like the legs being inked over to create a more bulbous bottom half. As though we see the skeleton under the skin.

  • Andrew
    8 December 2006 12:14 pm

    They say a happy cook is a fat cook, and you won’t find many people happier than the esteemed latvian folk-dancer-cum-sushi-chef Didier Olchjenko. Didi’s taste is impeccable, as any patron of his restaurants will tell you. His stocky hands are so quick and powerful that he has to keep his pomaceous gams covered up in the kitchen to prevent injury.

  • 8 December 2006 12:24 pm

    I don’t understand a word the ehrensenf lady is saying, but it looks a lot like Ze Frank’s Show. I like staring at her mole.

  • 8 December 2006 6:16 pm

    OK. At the risk of repeating myself here… you guys are amazing. What beautiful stories today! Sam, once again, off to an early lead with Jogo YangLang, who, as it turns out, was born exactly three weeks after yours truly. And we both ended up cold and wet in Hamburg, dancers for money, doing what they want us to do. What are the odds?
    Great thanks to Sam Berkes for the Ballad of Tulipán Feo. Can we get Alejandro González Iñárritu to make Tulipán’s story part of his next movie?
    And then there’s Andrew with the story of Didier Olchjenko, the folk dancing sushi chef of the lightning fast hands. Fantastic! Also—extra points for using the word “pomaceous”—Po*ma”ceous, a. [LL. ponum an apple.] 1. (Bot.) (a) Like an apple or pear; producing pomes. (b) Of or pertaining to a suborder (Pomeæ) of rosaceous plants, which includes the true thorn trees, the quinces, service berries, medlars, and loquats, as well as the apples, pears, crabs, etc—as if you didn’t know. Triple word score for Andrew.
    Jen, I kept staring at Katrin’s mole, too. If you look very closely, it’s a rotating spiral that’s digitally inserted to exert mind control over the viewer. If you found yourself buying extra cases of beer and bratwurst today—that’s why.
    I’ll say it again: You rock! Thank you for the excellent, excellent comments!

  • Greta
    8 December 2006 7:01 pm

    Wow! That’s the first monster I’ve watched and I can’t wait to go check out the rest. Awesome work!!

  • 8 December 2006 8:32 pm

    I think she played a bit part in Amores perros.

  • Leo Mausbach
    9 December 2006 12:57 am

    Your monsters are just great!
    I can’t wait to see more!!

  • 9 December 2006 1:03 am

    Thank you, Leo. I’m glad you like the monsters. The new one will be up in a couple of minutes—if the tech gods will smile on me tonight. :^)

  • 11 December 2006 2:08 pm

    what more can you find under the bed?! more monsters. heh. =o) good work, stefan.

  • 13 December 2006 7:49 pm

    Great Concept!! I love the site!
    -Munk One

  • sue bebie
    7 April 2008 3:27 am

    Mutti, Mutti, er hat überhaupt nicht gebohrt…
    Schlagzeile des Tages:
    Schrecken der Zahnpastenwerbung hat wieder mal zugeschlagen. Ein Aufschrei geht durch die Redaktionen der nationalen Werbefirmen…

  • Yamiris
    28 April 2008 9:01 am

    In the land of Rollerhill lived a Roller, named Rolly. Rolly was different from the average Roller. Not in a physical way because she looked like everyone was supposed to look. Now, not to say that the people in Rollerhill looked normal they had crazy hair and one rollerblade at the bottom of their body. No, Rolly was different then them in a personality way. Everybody was polite and cautious but Rolly was wild and carefree. She always got in trouble by the town manners commitee and sometimes by the guards. One day she did something so unroller like that she got thrown in the roller dungeon for a month. Anyways, Roller was rolling around crazy and being carefree as always going to school. Today Roller decided to go to the market to get a fresh rolange. The market roller asked her for the money and she handed it to him. Then she was going to lick the rolange she stuck out her tounge but missed the orange so it looked like she stuck her tounge out at the market roller. Of course, that was a very in polite thing to do so the market roller called the manners commitee. The manners commitee came and of course she had a trial but was still named guilty and was thrown in the roller dungeon, when she came out she was never the same. I guess the moral of the story is always use manners or else something bad will happen to you.

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