Good morning! I hope the day is treating you kindly so far. We’ve almost made it to the weekend. May it be a good one for you. There was in an article about free will and the possible absence of it in humans in today’s New York Times. It may explain why some of us are driven to draw monsters or write stories about them. But even if it’s all predetermined, you’ll still want to read these latest tales. They are, as always, very cool!


Right now, please meet Monsters 49a and 49b. Despite their somewhat dire dental situation they seem happy. Too happy, perhaps. There is something a bit unsettling about them. I can’t quite put my finger on it. What do you think these two are up to? Are they scheming? Dreaming? Merely beaming? Are they, perhaps, pulling each others finger just out of frame? Or do I have them all wrong? Are they discussing the latest advances in nuclear physics—a subject of which they may have personal experience? I know you have a theory! Will you please let us know about it?


You know it’ll make your day better.
It will certainly begin to explain why 344 LOVES YOU


  • 5 January 2007 5:15 am

    Take a look on my illustration based on Bucher´s:
    Each one of this have a tip of a different person from my house. For example;
    UNUBU(vulture) – my sister help me to see a bird and i prefer create a vulture.
    ELRATON – my first test whit the technical.
    Later i will provide the translation from my comments, feel free to add comment about it.

  • Bill B
    5 January 2007 7:40 am

    After the upset victory over the Mortuary State Cadavers the students of Crematorium Tech rushed the field. In the celebratory hysteria that followed two players were injured, four cheerleaders went missing, and both goal posts were torn down and dismantled. (Weeks later the goal posts would be found for bid on ebay, along with one of the cheerleaders.)
    With the championship game in two weeks Coach Growler knew he had a big problem. His soultions were limited. In an act of desparation he offered full scholarships to the Einstein twins. Surprised, they immediately accepted as they felt honored to be part of such a proud tradition.
    Their excitement was to be short lived as they stepped on to the football field and Coach postioned them ten yards deep in the endzone.
    “The goalposts won’t be fixed for a month. Now stand there and don’t move. And try not to get hurt. Go Flamers!”

  • Vizzan
    5 January 2007 10:43 am

    Well, it would make sense that a Twins fan would have two faces or heads as it were. Krag (also known as lefty) is an eternal dreamer who thinks this years pitching will overcome all enemies to take the division. While Grak (also known as Roger or Righty) thinks his Minnesota team is destined for the cellar.

  • 5 January 2007 11:42 am

    Cinncinati Twins, ha! See, now that’s funny.

  • 5 January 2007 12:25 pm

    Life as a thistle is loads of fun, sure–IF YOU’RE NOT SHARING A STALK WITH SOMEONE. Look, it’s not even that we have two heads. We’re two comletely different PLANTS. We know, we know, it’s weird. But we think differently, we talk differently, we even accessorize differently. This stupid sweatshirt? *SO* not my idea. Shut up, Frank. Wipe that silly grin off your face. Stop tickling us. I mean it. STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT STOP–

  • Sybil Mygin
    5 January 2007 7:52 pm

    It’s the new addition of an old favourite: SUPER CRAZY CRAZY GLUE OF SUPERIORITY!!! And you thought the old one was strong! For all of your adhesive problems (or perhaps annoying neighbors you think would be more enjoyable pasted to some large and hairy) buy a bottle today! (Side effects may include unnatural growth of teeth and genetic mutations. Monsters sold seperately.)

  • Rasmus
    5 January 2007 7:56 pm

    I wish I was a monster

  • 5 January 2007 8:06 pm

    The one on the right just realized that there’s one on the left. All these years and Monkey figured he was all alone, solely responsible for all the ridiculous, naughty, irreconcilable, redundant things he did. Monkey’s real stubborn and persistent, not given to much self-reflexivity. By sheer luck of bifurcation with a capital T, Monkey turned around one day and discovered Tiger. Tiger claims to be running the show. They happily argue all day and into the night.
    “‘Tis black.”
    “‘Tis not, ’tis white.”
    And so on, until eventually one agrees with the other, or pretends to, and off they go to share a grape nehi, drinking from the same glass, each with his own straw. Until the comeraderie becomes too boring:
    “Am not!”
    ah whatever. I guess I’m still too chuffed up with snot to think of anything very clever. I love ’em, whatever they are! Two heads: better than one??
    Couple weeks ago I changed the banner on my screensaver Mac to read Pull My Finger, gee how’s that for serendipity. Or pre-determinism. Something.
    Great stories, all! Got me laughing.
    Stefan I think you’ve sped up the film a bit. The letters and other things almost seem to draw themselves now!

  • 5 January 2007 8:08 pm

    oh and I love the new banners! They’re real purty and spiffy.

  • 5 January 2007 10:11 pm

    Nine years ago, it rained and was bitter cold. Despite being in the middle of the afternoon, the sun just couldn’t break through the clouds. It wasn’t dark, but it certainly wasn’t a bright and shiny moment on the calendar. Voices spoke quietly and the guests huddled together for warmth in the drafty old building. It was lightly decorated and there wasn’t much by way of the common amenities, but it worked well. The steps would creak as people walked up and down them and the humidity of the rain made much of the wood swell even though it was inside. It was the perfect location on the perfect day.
    After the small conversation to each other, they kissed. They’d rehearsed this moment diligently in the past, just without all the scripted dialogue prior. Everyone cheered and they headed out of the building to travel to the suite that was waiting for them. It was a wonderful room. All the creature comforts of home. Everything tidy and taken care of. They would be comfortable. Spared no expense. The “Joining” would take place shortly after arrival and then their new life could truly begin. Their life as One. One body. One heart.
    The Kaltooken’s “Joining” operation was a unqualified success. As with most Alderian Couplings (we understand them as weddings), the individuals truly become one, and with Fenlie and Yaldie, theirs was no different. Sure, they had a little more money to throw at the coupling, what with Yaldie’s parents being the galactic supplier of Bultaki Shaltots, but the doctors did a fine, fine job. These days, you can find them cheering on their favorite team, the Chaltock Tanderhoffs, or peddling a paddle boat down the Haldon Waterway. And everywhere you do see them, you’ll also see the happiest smiles this side of the Ulegaard Nebula. May everyone’s “Joining” operation be so successful.

  • 5 January 2007 10:34 pm

    The seventies brought forth many great triumphs; the Ford Pinto was first introduced, Mozambique gained independence from Portugal, and a small but monumental film from director Lee Frost was unleashed upon us.
    Satchel was all set to play a major part in Frost’s masterpiece, “The Thing with Two Heads” but got blacklisted at the last minute. Turns out he didn’t quite mesh with the other actors, what with his poor dental hygiene and the fact that he was a Twins fan.
    Now he spends his time selling toasted almonds on street corners and looking for extra work where he can. He shares a studio apartment with six other out of work actors in south Hollywood. Life is pretty good though, for a guy with two heads.

  • Inanna
    7 January 2007 8:36 am

    I know I’m late here, but it just came to me. These twins are the perfect illustration for intestinal distress. Meet Righty Tighty and Lefty Loosey.

  • Sue Bebie
    20 April 2008 5:56 am

    49a und 49b, nennen wir sie Hu und Go. HuGo sind als siamesische Zillinge untrennbar mitteinander verbunden; einmal Körper, zweimal Geist. Das strahlende Lachen von Hu und Go hat nichts mit dem allabendlichen Polieren der Hauer zu tun, nein einzig und allein die Gewissheit am Casting für das klügste Monster den Sieg zu erringen, lässt sie so strahlen. Go ist mit allen naturwissenschaftlichen Gesetzen, Formeln und deren Anwendungen bestens vertraut, und Hu deckt als polyglotter Linguistiker und passionnierter Poetry Slammer den sprachlichen Bereich hervorragend ab.
    Die Doppelhirnigkeit wird Ihnen bei der Fragenfülle, die auf sie einprasseln wird von grösstem Nutzen sein und ihnen den sicheren Sieg einbringen.

Leave A Comment