Good morning. I’ve been a bad, bad blogger. Please excuse the long absence. It’s been an absolutely exhausting week. Productive, though: I designed the cover for the UCLA Extension Fall catalog cover as part of their… ahem… Masters of Graphic Design program. (Paul Rand and I… we’re like this!) You can click on the image for a larger view:


I put together the first two sample spreads for the Monster Book, and got to talk with a great many of you in the process of gathering all the necessary release forms to put your cool stories into print. (You’ve all been extremely kind about it! Thank you!) I also designed 46 new objects for the upcoming Echo Park Time Travel Mart, put together a new 48-page brochure for L.A. Louver, and almost, almost have the Hockney Catalog done.


I’m exhausted! After a certain point, you can burn yourself out with fun work just as easily as with lame work. Even with self-generated projects there is a level of administrative song-and-dance that’s not fun and makes me retreat into my head. So I thought I’d do something nice for myself and for you:

I know I kind of spoiled the surprise with the title of this entry, but I hope you won’t mind too much. If you’re game, I hope you’ll once again


I will have a lot more fun stuff for you in the coming days! For now, I hope you enjoy the first of the Weekly Monsters and know that 344 LOVES YOU


  • Dor
    9 May 2007 1:14 pm

    Glad to have you back for a weekly monster!!!
    a great monster once again

  • 9 May 2007 1:17 pm

    I love that kangaroo metaphor, amazing how you can still come up with funny ideas after such a load of work. Great to see the Monster making a come back!
    Pardon my nerdiness, it seems you have parted ways with the old, trusty friend Helvetica and started dating Miss Univers. Care to comment on that?-)

  • 9 May 2007 1:20 pm

    Wow, what a great mid-day surprise! Weekly monster #1 looks great! I can’t wait to put my writing cap back on.
    Your cover for the UCLA Extension Fall catalog cover looks great. Makes me want to enroll just so I can get a copy.

  • 9 May 2007 1:28 pm

    Hey guys! Thank you for being there right at the start of Season 2. :^)
    I’m glad you’re enjoying the first Weekly Monster!
    Simon, you’re very perceptive. I’m still married to Helvetica, but I’m seeing Miss Univers on the side. And sometimes I just get plain kinky with Stymie, who I met at a bar.
    Sam, I’m glad you like the UCLA Extension cover. They’re printing a whopping 260,000 copies of that thing. I’ll put up a note when it’s actually printed and available. I believe you can request a copy on their site.

  • stacy
    9 May 2007 1:36 pm

    yippee… the monsters are back!
    I have been checking the site periodically hoping for a new post, and this just made my day 🙂

  • Danielle
    9 May 2007 3:49 pm

    I’m thinking you’re a workaholic.
    Edwin was an awkward fellow. This morning he decided to write a passionate love note to Silvia forgetting all about yesterday when he announced to the class that she has very prominent buck teeth. He snuck it through the slits in her locker while she was in the bathroom and made sure to watch her read the note from down the hallway and around the corner. When she crinkled her face in disgust and stomped the note into the ground, his meager attempt to woo her with his physique ended with a tiny wave and tingle. “Maybe next time,” he thought.

  • 9 May 2007 4:24 pm

    A young monster, barely aware of the world. No frowns or wrinkles; just that innocent look, happy and friendly to everyone.
    Let’s hope he doesn’t run into the Slasher or the Demented Lab Assistant.

  • 9 May 2007 7:35 pm

    Woo-hoo! I’ve been waiting for Weekly Monster to start up, what a nice treat!

  • heather s
    10 May 2007 10:28 am

    Ack!! A new monster! It’s been the week of good news for me and this guy tops it off, thanks Stephen!
    As for the monster?
    Well, his name is Barley, and he mostly just wanted to say “hi”.

  • Turtle
    11 May 2007 6:32 am

    Poor Benjamin hoped that his wide smile would distract from the plant growing from his backside.

  • Vietnam holiday
    11 May 2007 7:42 am

    Your post’s very good. I like it.

  • bbibo
    12 May 2007 9:03 am

    My muse has returned!
    Joey wasn’t like the other kids. Joey was different, and that never bothered him too terribly much. He had a few close friends at school that he sat by at lunch and talked with at recess, but afterwards he was pretty much a loner.
    After school the other kids ran home to their Playstations or played team sports. Joey didn’t like video games and he wasn’t very good at sports. He had an eye condition that affected his depth perception. His eyes were, as his mother so politely put it to her friends and neighbors, “just a bit off center”.
    But Joey was happy. Everyday on his way home from school he would wander through the back yard of the Melamine Bros cat food factory. There among the discarded bags of tainted food and old broken down machinery, he found a wonderous world waiting just for him. For Joey collected bugs, and there were a lot of bugs in the yard behind the cat food factory.
    Once he captured an interesting speciman in his jar, he would carefully catalog it based on its order, family, genus, and species. He would draw a colorful portrait of each one, and when one was particularly fascinating he would ask to borrow his mother’s camera and take several pictures of it.
    Then when it was finally bedtime, just before he would turn out the light, he would open his jar and carefully remove his latest speciman. With a quick toss he would throw it into his mouth and eat it, drifting off to a sound and contented sleep.

  • tuesday
    15 May 2007 11:56 pm

    monsieur baleine was feeling rather sheepish for day-dreaming on a fresh dish of porridge bird eggs sprinkled with nutmeg, ketchup and feta while poor mem. morses worried over the prospect of her son leaving school to becomes a globe trotting sea captain for a roving band of brooding and haughty scientologist.

  • 20 May 2007 12:01 am

    Wow where have I been? I’m slacking in getting some 344 love! So glad that the monsters have returned – thanks Stefan! The catalogue cover looks AWESOME.
    This lil’ feller ate more than his fair share of PEZ. That is why you are missing yours. He wants you to believe that there is nothing to smell here, move along. No silly, his breath!

  • 18 March 2008 10:45 pm

    “You have to understand… it’s not like we have any say in the matter. This is the decision by the school board and the transfer is quite final.”
    Tarlton couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Despite all the rumors, it was clear his parents would never know the true workings of the school district. He wasn’t an especially bad young student, he just had an incredible string of bad luck that put him in the wrong place at the wrong time almost consistently throughout the school year.
    The shoelace incident? How could he be to blame – he used velcro. The Cafeteria Calamity of Central Academy? A regrettable moment which could have been adverted had Tarlton not been bullied out of his homemade lunch that day. Countless more “issues” occurred and just about every one having a witness testifying against poor Tarlton. He was to be transferred to the Institute for Misunderstood Adolescents Gone Evil (or IMAGE – as in, to keep up one).
    As he stood by the curb, the next morning, waiting to be transported to IMAGE, he gave a look back at his clueless parents. Tarlton knew he wouldn’t be returning. No one “returned” from this boarding school. Oh, sure there were tales of great success with students sent to IMAGE, but no one ever really heard from them after “graduating.” It was best not to worry his parents with those little facts. He gave a wave with a forced smile and wagged his tail. They waved back. The bus arrived and off he went to confront an unknown future.
    Tarlton’s father looked over at his wife, “So… how should we spend the lab money? After our debts, we’d have enough left over for that bungalow in the west islands. That IMAGE program sure approached us at the right time.”

  • Sue Bebie
    16 May 2008 4:23 am

    101 ist geschlüpft
    101 fixfertig gestylt im Nadelstreifenanzug Wie aus dem Ei gepellt
    Muss an der Genialität des Zeichners liegen!

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