DAILY MONSTER 191 (of 200)
Good morning. How are you? Is the week going well for you thus far? Good things are happening? People you like are calling you about nice things? I do hope so! It’s springtime, and by all rights the week should bring such things, don’t you think? If nothing else this week and next will hold for you a fresh monster every day. And that’s something, isn’t it?
Have I mentioned lately how inspiring it is to see all of you weigh in with such funny, excellent, and altogether odd stories? Well… it is. There are Tooth Fairy mechanics at work here: I put a monster under my pillow each night, and by the time I wake up again there are lots of great stories waiting for me. (Which also means I’m getting a much better exchange rate from you than I’d get from the Tooth Fairy.) What I’m saying is: Thank you!
Now, how about we go meet Monster 191?
Once again we appear to be faced with a happy creature. And who wouldn’t be a little bit happy with fine green dungarees and some blue shoes? But is that the only reason 191 is happy? What else would make it smile so? Who is it giving a wave? Is somebody coming to meet it? Did it just part with somebody? What do they talk about when they’re together? Is there small talk? Is there mutual grooming? What are the monster rituals for creating a social bond? By now, you all have masters in monster anthropology, so I’m counting on your insight once again. Would you please…
I’m looking forward to seeing
what you have to teach me about 191.
In the meantime, I hope you’ll have
a great day. Rest assured that 344 LOVES YOU
Ray Leno waves a morning goodbye to his brother as he drives off on his Harley.
Mister Greenwood is doing his garden. His green pants goes well with the green, green grass of home. The blue fancy shoes contrasts with the ground. And the best thing of all is, that the luminous paint is like a danger sign to the worms, the nightcrawlers and all the other little creatures. They know now, that they should stay at their cosy home while Mister Grennwood cuts grass or put some green cabbage into the soil.
He was clean, he was tidy…he had new green pants on that were creased neatly…he was SMILING….why weren’t people stopping to pick him up? He’d hoped not to have to walk all the way. All he needed was ONE person who didn’t mind a backseat, um, backseat and frontseat, driver…
How ya doing Mac? What brings to this part of town. Don’t get no city dudes here no more, not since I shot that guy a while back. But don’t worry buddy. I won’t be shooting ya, I got some new meds that the Doc saids make me like new. Hahah. Want some spaghetti and meatballs? Got a new recipe with a secrete sauce in it. Most run to the bathroom after taking a bight, but I bet you can handle it. You look long the strong type. Bet you could rassel a bare, ifen you wanted to. Got a big grizzlie out back if you want to try. His namea Tiny. Called’em that since he’s about 8ft. Some say his papys about 9ft. Say, want some beer? Brew in the same bath a wash in. Gives it that fresh new smell. Oh? You gotta go already? Didn’t you want to try some of my Food? Oh well. Next time you blow through I save some beer and Balls for ya. Have FUN!
He hoped nobody noticed he sucked the night from the sky and blew it through his skin and crinkled hair. As his webbed toes pointed in his finest pointy boots he floated up and away to join the others in a world where dark was light and light was dark. He smiled to himself as he realized it didn’t have to rest only in imagination. Buh-bye!
The spring breeze whispers,
“Come outside and play, Frankford”
He skips up and down.
Tod had always had a crush on this girl cheerleader named Courtine. She was the most beautiful girl in all of Monster High. He didn’t think that she liked him. But today she sees Courtine with all the other cheerleaders. Some of them are whispering to her,” Just ask her.” “There probably talking aout someone she likes and it couldn’t possibly be me, Tod thinks. But then Courtine walks up to him and asks if he wants to go on a date. He is thrilled! He’s too suprised to speak so he nods his head yes. “Well, great!” she says in her cheery voice and kisses him on the cheek and runs to her next class leaving Tod too star-struck to speak! And that was only the beginning of the perfect day…
Phil was a shy little guy, ordinarily. But while looking for some cardamom at his local food mart, Phil would soon break free of his shell. He saw his idol, Padma Lakshmi, standing by the deli counter waiting for filming to resume on Top Chef. Normally resistant to drawing attention to himself, Phil threw caution to the wind and let a huge grin fly. He waved frantically in her direction but couldn’t get her attention. She eventually looked over her shoulder and waved back. It was the best day ever.
“So I said ‘No way!’, and then she said ‘Yes way!, to which I like said, I’m suuure”, said Algamat. I was sorry to have walked in on the conversation, as Algamat always talks like a valley girl from the ’80s and he is so not.
“Tubular!”, he cried out as he saw me. “You are totally sluggin'”, he added… which was true. I had on my bright pink hot pants and neon green tube top which showed off my bod to its best advantage. However, my duds were no match for Algamat’s pale green Bermuda shorts and baby blue high tops and that cannot be tolerated.
So I gagged him with a spoon.
The studying: endless nights of reading, examining strains and cross-pollination charts through red and tired eyes. Coffee and knowledge were his only intake for nine solid years- but the goal never strayed. He’d been approached by women who were sure to stray him from his path, but he shooed them away: more work to do, less time for mucking about. I don’t have a phone anyways.
The college seemed against him. The teachers tried their best to thwart him from this point. And yet after all the hardships, the grant wrestling, the lectures… here he was. He had purchased this suit long before applying to school, to wear it for this very day, the day of reckoning. The shirt didn’t fit. No matter. He folded it up and left it at home in the dusty sunlight, and went shirtless. Nothing was to stop him, not even embarrassment.
He crossed the stage and accepted it in his hands! He’d gotten his doctorate in Sea- Artichoke Health!
this monster is my favorite! i love his big teeth and hair… i think it is brilliant